The Paradox of Yes and No
Power, Adventure, and the Irony of Choice
“Every choice is a door, but the irony is, you’ll never know what’s behind it until you walk through. Both ‘yes’ and ‘no’ are acts of faith, both are acts of fear. Neither guarantees anything.”
The phrase "a simple yes or no" sounds simple, doesn’t it? Yet, at its heart lies the paradox of choice. There’s power in saying 'no' and adventure in saying 'yes.' Neither is inherently "right." Yet, their outcomes - judged as triumph, tragedy, or something in between - are wildly unpredictable.
The power of 'no' is a shield. Each 'no' - to a misaligned commitment, an overextending demand, or an opportunity that feels wrong - defines us. It guards our sanity, time, and energy. Too many 'yeses,' and we invite an endless supply of fuckery.
But say 'no' too often, and we risk isolation. The walls we build for protection can become a solitary kingdom. Missed connections, foregone paths, the synchronicities of serendipity. What would be answers, instead become entries in the “what if” queue, which is a road that ultimately leads to regret.
'Yes' is the adventurer’s creed, the artist’s first brushstroke. Saying 'yes' to an unexpected invitation or an unfamiliar road sparks new passions, forges new bonds, and reveals hidden strengths. Each 'yes' is a ticket to experience.
Yet, 'yes' can lead to nightmares of its own. The wrong job, the wrong relationship, the spiraling commitment - we overextend, misjudge, and find ourselves drained. Next thing you know, we’re mopping up floors we never intended to bleed on. The openness of 'yes' invites trials as much as triumphs, woven together in a gamble with chance.
In this paradox, saying 'no' empowers but can isolate; saying 'yes' excites but can overwhelm. The trick isn’t a fixed rule but discernment, honed by each choice and subsequent experience. Sometimes, the boldest act is saying 'no' to more; sometimes, the strongest stance is a vulnerable 'yes' to the unknown.
The answer lies in blending both, and learning to trust ourselves - a daunting adventure of its own. Saying 'no' to peer pressure or endless favors sets boundaries, which is a quiet superpower to be sure. Saying 'yes' to a new connection, or an opportunity to speak up, be heard, and/or make things right, cracks open life’s routine, letting in some much needed light.
We obsess over the “right” choice, but rightness emerges only after we choose and live the consequences of our choices. The real power isn’t in 'yes' or 'no' - it’s in the intuition to choose with eyes open, knowing the outcome isn’t guaranteed. That’s the courage that shapes a life well lived.
Be well!